Hilda Greenhill's Diary 5th Entry
A bit of a short chapter, but I think it has more impact than something that is long.
I find nights are the worst. During the day, at least, there are moments when I almost forget what has happened, like when Ori drew the picture of Kili and I. I have company around me and many of the dwarves have been kind, but I still feel alone, even when there are lots of people around me. My dreams are full of nightmarish images of orcs tearing through the farm, killing as they go. But as monstrous as those dreams are, the worst I get are those dreams when I dream of my family alive. These dreams begin happy and I enjoy them at first. Here, at least, they are with me. But they are insidious. They deceive me into thinking that my family are alive. At some point in them I realise they are gone, and harsh reality comes crashing in on me. I lose them all over again.
The darkness is oppressive.